The 11 Differences Between Dating a Girl vs a Woman

woman photo by daniele martinie

Recently, I wrote a post on “The 11 Difference Between Dating a Boy vs a Man“. The post can have the genders swapped and most points would still apply. However, we can’t deny that there are some fundamental differences between men and women – from how we are socialized to the chemical and hormonal differences that naturally occur. Thus, I thought it appropriate to follow up with a post on the difference between dating a girl, vs a woman. Again, many points on this post would apply if you switched the genders around.

A boy is attracted to girls. A man is attracted to women. Now, this has nothing to do with the actual age of a person. I’m referring to maturity, life vision and stage of life. In fact, some people regardless of their age, will never really grow up. Also, this isn’t to say that a woman won’t ever have “girlish” or immature tendencies or vice versa. This post refers to one’s maturity and most points would also apply if you switch the genders as well.

If you are a boy, then expect that you will attract only girls. However, if you are a man (independent, knows your worth and value, has a strong moral compass, is considerate and an able communicator and doesn’t let insecurity dominate your psyche), then you should be dating a woman. And if you can’t spot the difference just yet, here are some pointers.

1. A girl throws tantrums. When displeased, upset or angry, she reacts just as she did as a child when she didn’t get her way with her parents. This often consists of screaming, pouting, giving the silent treatment, being passive aggressive and/or punishing. A woman still feels the emotions of being upset/displeased, but has cultivated the skill of responding versus reacting. She comes to the table as an adult, and communicates clearly what is bothering her.

2. A girl perceives herself as a princess and believes people should treat her like so. She is entitled and feels that she is owed and therefore expects more than she appreciates. A woman, has standards (what she holds herself to) not expectations (what she projects on to others).

3. A girl uses her physical beauty as her currency and basis of value. A girl may be so used to feeling validated through her looks and sexuality, that she uses this as her primary tool to get what she wants in life. A woman, knows her worth is beyond her physicality. A woman bases her value on her intelligence, her strength, her integrity, her values, her contributions, her humanity.

4. A girl banks on a man to be her financial strategy. A woman plans to be financially independent – she banks on… herself. And if she so happens to enter a relationship dynamic where it makes sense for her partner to be the primary breadwinner, it’s considered a bonus, not the expected life line.

5. A girl sees the world from a place of lack and scarcity. She competes and will even tear down another in order to secure resources or a mate. A woman helps other women. She knows that there’s plenty enough to go around and takes the high road of integrity to get what she wants.

6. A girl cannot be bothered with anything domestic and is proud of the fact that she cannot cook or clean. A woman understands that being domestic is not a duty, but understands that it is one way of taking care of herself and others. She also understands that in the event she wants to create a family, having a person in the household who can contribute domestically is important.

7. “A girl wants attention, a woman wants respect. A girl wants to be adored by many. A woman wants to be adored by one.” -anonymous

8. A girl does not respect her body.  She has not yet understood that her body and heart are sacred, and that it’s important to be mindful of how she treats it and who she shares it with. “A girl cherishes handbags, diamonds and her shoe collection as her prize possessions. A woman cherishes her health, her sense of self, and her talents as her greatest assets.” – N. Mah

9. A woman takes the time to reflect on the type of human she wants to be, the example she wants to leave and the vision for her life. She has put thought into her values and what she stands for. A girl has not established her moral compass or values and consequently, is often inconsistent. “After spending time with a girl, you feel exhausted because she takes more than she gives. After spending time with a woman, you feel invigorated, because she empowers you with possibility, and a passion for life.” – N. Mah

10. A girl has a checklist that prioritizes superficial qualities above anything else. Here is an example of how this checklist may look: Hot, popular, wears skinny jeans, over 6 feet tall, rich.. This is the checklist of what a woman may look for: High integrity, intelligent, kind, good communicator, emotionally available…

Now, a lot of these differences require taking the time to know someone to figure out if the apple of your eye is indeed a mature woman, or someone with an immature mindset. However, one of the quickest filters that you can notice from the beginning is this:

11. A girl plays games. A woman doesn’t.

A girl jumps from one social circle to another, making fast friends that don’t last. A woman values her deep friendships and nurtures that bond with time, gratitude, energy and thoughtfulness.

Nadia Mah


Photo credit: Daniele Martinie


  • Reply February 11, 2015


    It depends on who is dating a girl or a woman. Insecure (or just weird) adult men prefer girls, but real men usually love to go out with real women. Just my humble opinion.

  • […] A girl is attracted to boys. A woman is attracted to men. Now, this has nothing to do with the actual age of a person. I’m referring to maturity, life vision and stage of life. In fact, some people regardless of their age, will never really grow up. You can switch the genders in this post and most points would likely still apply. Or, read this post on “The 11 Differences Between Dating a Girl vs a Woman“. […]

  • […] switch the genders in this post and most points would likely still apply. Or, read this post on “The 11 Differences Between Dating a Girl vs a Woman“. If you are a girl (lack independence, are ruled by insecurity, lack self-respect, throw […]

    • Reply November 12, 2015


      Interesting. Sounds like a mix of current political correctness and poetry. Give me something real. Plenty of women aren’t this majestic spiritual unicorn that they claim to be. I mean men are claimed to be dogs just as much as boys. I’ve seen plenty of grown mature women after the same things. I mean lets throw this political correctness in the garbage, where it belongs, and be real.

      • Reply November 18, 2015


        I don’t feel this is garbage and actually see myself in this list. I’m not perfect and have my flaws but I am self aware and know how to take a step back and reflect on my feelings. I know what I want and what I offer but it’s take me 30 years and a lot of work on myself to be the person I am today. My closest friends fall into this category, too. There is a big difference between women and girls. I don’t think being a “woman” as this list outlines makes myself, or anyone else with these qualities, a unicorn.

  • Reply May 4, 2015

    Rod Stokes

    Words can not express, the relevance of this article. It essentially sums up my experiences.

  • Reply June 7, 2015

    Christians are wrong about... Sex Before Marriage -

    […] (Source) […]

  • Reply June 22, 2015


    Hm. Interesting. Since mother’s (maternal figures) are a male’s subconscious way of projecting his idea of a typical females behavior, I suppose the guys raised by “girls” will not even recognize a woman.

    Sad stuff man. I’m in that boat. My mom’s a girl. Does all these things (mentioned as immature) to this day (age 50+) and all I seem to be attracting are females like herself. I even think about spoiling my gf if I ever get one. I suppose that’s because she likes to be spoiled.

    Damn. Women, oops I meant girls, love how generous and giving I am. They eat it up. After reading this, my behavior seems to be similar to shooting myself in the foot.

  • Reply July 3, 2015


    As reading this article, I was thinking at how I had evolved from the girl I used to be to the woman I love more and more each day. I am 30 now and I honestly say that I have been/ I have acted as a “girl” quite a lot time… and I still have ìnner spots to work on, as I still respond to life as I were a girl. A very important step in the process (a girl becoming a woman) is forgiveness… Beginning with the parents. Do you remember Britney’s song “I am not a girl not yet a woman”? :) i will listen to it right now.

  • […] (Main Sources: Daily Mail, Elite Daily, Female Breadwinners, Just My Type) […]

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